Daily Bread #131

I last wrote about my weight management journey on October 4, 2020. At that time my total weight loss was 183.5 pounds, and I was only interested in maintaining that weight and not in losing any more. Almost four months later, my total weight loss is 185.1, which is not very different although it is down very slightly. I have very consistently remained under 140 pounds during that time. Not too bad, as my starting weight was 322.

Back in November, I thought I had everything about this journey under control and so I stopped attending the support group I had been in since beginning the weight management program in April of 2018. I continued to record all my calories and my exercise and weighed myself daily. I am still doing that.

I did hit a rough patch for a couple of weeks at the beginning of February. My beloved spouse had open heart surgery (see poem about it) and I was worried and stressed during the surgery, her hospitalization, and the initial recovery which was rocky. The COVID restrictions didn’t help as we could only communicate via phone and video calls during the 11 days she was in the hospital. Her recovery is steady now, although it will still be a longish haul before we can hit the trails together again, but my stress level and worry level is back down to normal again.

What is interesting is that during those first two weeks I was very conscious that I was “stress-eating”, something I had not done in over two years. I wasn’t excessive, just an extra cookie or two, some salami and a few chips at a time, but it felt weird. I had gotten used to eating treats when I wanted them, but this was more like a craving and not just a desire. It didn’t make me happy, because I knew it was a dangerous pattern to start up again even if it wasn’t causing me to gain any weight. Some stress might burn a few calories, I think, which may be an explanation of why I didn’t gain. Or maybe my body just wants to be the weight I am now. Plus I kept exercising, even though I was over my calorie “budget” most days.)

It was a danger sign, though, the stress eating, but I did reel myself back in, and I also checked in on Facebook with my support group which helped. It really is a marathon.

We need to keep on learning, no matter how old we are.

L’Chaim!