Weekly Bread #137

My left knee had its second birthday this week. The ice machine above that I used for pain and swelling relief post surgery now lives in our basement. I hope I haven’t worn the new knee out in two years with all the hiking I have done! It does ache sometimes, worse than the the other, original, knee. I thought I would need both knees done, but the surgery and recovery were hard and I am not sure I want to go through that again. My knees only hurt after 8+ miles though, and Tylenol is still doing the trick, so no worries yet.

This week I am awaiting results of a biopsy on a couple of thyroid nodules that grew a bit in the last 2 years. Hopefully all will be fine and the results will be benign. Worst case, I lose my thyroid gland. Thyroid cancer is one of the more treatable cancers so even in the worst case, it likely won’t be terrible. Still, it is a worry. I must say I had the thought that if the prognosis was bad, I could start quite blithely overeating again as it wouldn’t matter.

Aging is an interesting journey and I have been blessed with two plus years of continued improvement of my health. I did know it couldn’t last forever. Nothing does. We take one day at a time and are grateful for the sunshine and the intermittent smoke-free days.

Funny how this blog has turned into a journal of sorts. I kept one for years as a youth and young adult, so this is coming full circle, but in a way more public way. At a certain point it my life, I got beyond shame. It really isn’t a helpful feeling. Guilt maybe is OK, if it causes you to change your actions and try to make amends, but shame just eats at your soul. Shame can freeze you in place. I want to live, unafraid and unashamed of who I am.

L’Chaim!

My average weight this week is down 1 pound for a total loss of 172.4

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